Surrounded by a gaggle of giggling girls dressed to the nine who were looking to bag themselves a bargain and if not a modelling contract with one of the best agencies in the UK, Select, I only had to follow the sound of stiletto heels to find my way to the main entrance. That’s if I wasn’t taken out en route, the prospect of 2 for 1, huge discounts, freebies and half naked males sent these women into frenzy. I am astonished I came out with all limbs intact, as the fight at the Paul’s Boutique stand for the ‘Quilted Molly Bag’ with a £20 off label left me with scratches down my right arm and a bruised ego. If you hadn’t have guessed it already, I was at the place of hell for every beer drinking, sports loving male – The Clothes Show Live.
With this being my fifth year to the show, I knew what to expect: the pitch some girls can reach when they catch sight of a D-list celeb or one of the dancers in a pair of boxers, the queues to get into the big labelled stores, such as SuperDry, Rimmel, Barry M and Lee Stafford, as well as the shire size of the whole event, hence why I wore flat shoes.
Don’t get me wrong, I do the love the Clothes show, but the volume of ‘tacky’ merchandise on sale took me aback. It seems that for the majority of people selling at the event it has become a ‘make money fast scheme.’ I say that because half of the items that were being sold had large garish signs depicting their prices, placed there in hope of covering the poorly manufactured pieces, which were probably produced in terrible conditions in an over crowded sweatshop in the middle east, but who am I to question their ethos. £5, £10, £15 and £20 were the totals of desire and what teenage girl or middle aged woman for that matter wouldn’t be enticed to buy.
The beauty section only continued this trend. If you want to adopt the look of ‘Amy Child’ or ‘Lauren Goodger’ this is the place for you. As the extensive fake-tan, hair extensions and false eye-lash stalls were in abundance. Heavily tweezered, tanned and toned men helped advertise all these products, the whole mix sounds all so over the top, but it in fact worked so well. After being harassed by the staff on different magazine subscription stands, to buy their £1 offer and receive a free goodie bag, I headed straight to the black and pink ‘zones,’ where I was pleasantly surprised at what was on offer. The numerous stalls reflected the recent style focus on the subculture turned mainstream that is vintage and boutique clothing. From fur coats to one-of designer dressers by ‘Anita’s vintage’ and ‘Zedeye,’ there was a lot on offer for the fashionista.
With various other catwalks to the main dance show dotted around the area it seemed only polite to watch one, it is part of the experience you see. I chose to go to a hair demonstration, where in which they picked one of the audience members to do a make over on. How exciting I hear you say, I suppose it would have been if the end result were anything special. If it were me who had been sitting in that hot seat and came out with the same end result as the ‘chosen one,’ Claire, I would have cried. Inches had been cut off, hair was everywhere and yet the stylist’s scissors were still going crazy, diving in at all angles and taking chunks here and there. The innocent victim took one look at herself in the mirror on the reveal, screamed and quickly ran off stage. I still don’t know if it was a scream of happiness or upset, but I would vote for the latter.
To end the day, I was booked in for the dance show at 4.30pm and after the usual introductions from the presenters, George Best and Grace Woodward, Alexandra Burke performed her number one single ‘Bad boys.’ I say performed, what I actually meant was she mimed a few words, sang a trill here and there, but focused more on her flirting with the Dirty Sexy Things star, BB, whilst throwing in the odd body roll. ‘A Night at the Department Store’ the title of the show was a satirical spin-off to ‘A Night in the Muesuem’ bringing to life the manikins of a department store. This was by far the best part of the day for me, as ‘floor six’ saw the presentation of next season’s lingerie. Gorgeous male and female models and dancers flooded the stage telling the story of the secret life of clothes. As you can image the crowd went wild, only adding further to the egos of each and very male on the stage. The whole production is very cleverly done; with skilled chorography intertwined with current hit tracks and clothing that can be purchased in the main hall, all provoking you to spend more.
Overall, although the event has become very commercial, it is still a fantastic day out, drawing in large numbers each year. It has opened up the world of fashion to everyone, creating an exciting and highly enjoyable event for people who wouldn’t normally be exposed to it. Despite elements being tacky to myself, there are a variety of different elements and ‘zones’ where you can find something for everyone, from champagne bars to nail stands to ethic jewellery. I would definitely recommend you book to go next year and pay the little extra needed for a platinum ticket, meaning you’ll get really good seats in the fashion theatre, who wouldn’t want to be closer to these models?
Well written!
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